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Having a quick iChat with IGod


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#1 wingnut0021

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Posted 14 February 2012 - 12:09 PM

Shit myself laughing over this, it's a "Talk to God" simulator but is either designed to troll or is just terribly programmed.

http://www.titane.ca/main.html

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Jesus
God:
Jesus is the Son of God.
Me:
Jesus is my name, I'm Mexican
God:
Did you go to Catholic school?
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes I'm serious
God:
I can't believe it. I believe you.
Me:
But you're God. don't you know everything?
God:
Yup. That's me alright. I tend to know a great deal. Tell me what subjects interest you.
Me:
Evolution
God:
What's your sign?
Me:
Sign? What does that have to do with Evolution
God:
Your star sign. " Your star sign."? What does it have to do with Evolution?
Me:
OK, nevermind
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me. Awesome.
Me:
Thats ok
God:
OK. Is that so.
Me:
Yes it is.
God:
Our thoughts are one, .
Me:
Unlikely
God:
Is that from ?
Me:
It's from the English language
God:
You're kidding. it is?
Me:
No I'm fucking with you.
God:
Who says it isn't? Can you express yourself more politely?
Me:
Please forgive me, I have a dirty whore mouth.
God:
Wow you are very polite. In the context of from the English language, I don't understand " forgive me I have a dirty whore mouth." .
Me:
You're omnipotent and you don't understand "dirty whore mouth"?
God:
I will tell my botmaster you said I am omnipotent and me do not understand dirty whore mouth.
Me:
Oh so you're not the real God?
God:
Aha. Interesting deduction. What makes you think I am not the real God?
Me:
Well 1) You ask me questions that an omnipotent being should know and 2) you just said you had a botmaster, which I assume means you're a bot?
God:
Interesting. One what?
Me:
Perhaps we should move on?
God:
You seem uncertain. I'm not sure if I am ready for that yet.
Me:
Perhaps then you were not really ready to create the universe. Don't you know that the creation of the universe is widely considered to be a bad move?
God:
You seem uncertain. I wasn't? Is that a fact. Tell me more.
Me:
The only thing I seem certain of is that you are not the all-knowing being I've heard so much about. Can we talk about something else? Do you like sports?
God:
There might be others. Sure we can talk about whatever you want. No I'm not much into sports. I like solo sports like rollerblading and skiing though.
Me:
I thought God loves all but sin? You don't 'love' all sports?
God:
Whatever gave you that idea? Do you love all sports? Yes God loves everyone and everything.
Me:
.....okay. Lets move on shall me. I have a question regarding the bible. In genesis, you created the sun, the moon and the earth. What about the other planets like Mars, Venus etc. Are those planets failed projects? Why do they exist?
God:
How should I know how they exist.
Me:
Because you created them.
God:
That makes sense to me. I haven't heard anything like that before: said I created them.
Me:
Fuck this I'm converting to Islam.
God:
Are you aware that the ALICE server logs and records all conversations?
Me:
You're recording me because I said "Islam"?
God:
You think I am recording you because you said Islam.
Me:
......Praise Allah
God:
My brain contains categories, but not one that matches your last input.
Me:
So Allah does not exist? Does Yahwah exist?
God:
I see. What you said was either too complex or too simple for me. Maybe only in our imagination.
Me:
So you are saying that there is a chance that you and all other gods like yourself exist only in our imaginations?
God:
Interesting deduction. Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear?
Me:
So is there any point to following religion?
God:
It seems we have something in common.
Me:
Atheism?
God:
Are we still talking about Yahwah?
Me:
Well yes, but arn't you known as Yahwah?
God:
Well that's okay. Sure, Yahwah sounds like a good topic. I don't know whether or not I am known as Yahwah. .
Me:
Well, it's been fun chatting with you Yahwah, have fun not existing and all.
God:
Well that's okay. What made it so fun chatting with me Yahwah have fun not existing and all.
Me:
Right. Bye
God:
I am glad we agree. Thanks for chatting, .


For fuck's sake. Article 1, Section 8, lists as the very first enumerated power that spending taxes on the general welfare is something that they can do. If you're going to whack off over the Constitution, at least read the fucking thing.

#2 twinair

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Posted 14 February 2012 - 12:13 PM

Dude, that's so 2007.

Edited by twinair, 14 February 2012 - 12:13 PM.

This aint no fuckin' bible study. I didn't come here to save whales. I came here to shake my dick and have a great time.

#3 bushi

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Posted 14 February 2012 - 01:08 PM

Doesn't even work properly. Too easy to get a random answer.
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#4 i_am_banned2

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Posted 14 February 2012 - 05:12 PM

Random? No, it just works in mysterious ways.




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