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The one that got away


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#21 komuso

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Posted 16 July 2018 - 11:28 PM

 

 

...

Where are you these days? I think its been 4 years since we last met, and I'm sorry we didn't hang out more.

 

Rob.

 

 

Hey Rob. Likewise! I've been pretty slack getting in contact with people whenever I've been in Japan the last few years... once I get over there, I usually spend what scant time I can get with my girlfriend. I'll be in Tokyo for a week or so this September, if you're still there? Very much looking forward to hearing tales. I'm in Melbourne these days.


Edited by komuso, 16 July 2018 - 11:28 PM.


#22 chrisg

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Posted 17 July 2018 - 08:17 PM

only one... she died in a car accident over a third of a century ago, and i miss her almost every day quite considerably

 

but at the time she was lost to me, we had been together for over a year and it was still getting better all the time; she was gorgeous, creative, clever, vivacious, petite and probably even naughtier than i was, in a good way, and she adored me

 

 

 

a few decades on might have been a different story, but losing a soul mate on the ascendant is not something i would wish on anyone else  :(

Disturbingly similar to my own situation back in '74. I was engaged to the most marvelous girl who was on work experience in the U.S. I was in the U.K.

 

In Atlanta she was smeared up against bridge parapet by some drunken trucker, died instantly.

 

In those days it took me a few days to even find out, never been near Atlanta since.

 

Perhaps it explains my sequence of future relationships, never found her again, should never have expected to, she was a one-of-a kind....

 

Cheers


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#23 Nich...

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Posted 17 July 2018 - 08:38 PM

I spoke to her less and less over the years - or rather, the replies were more and more infrequent.

One week, we were joking about her turning 21 again, the next, she was dead.

I feel sad every time I think of her, or am reminded of her.  I regret not taking more time to spend with her.  Meeting most of her close her friends for the first time at her wake was not conducive to staying in touch with them, or being comfortable enough to reminisce without it getting depressing.  I regret not knowing her well enough by that point to know one way or the other if there was foul play, or she took her own life.


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#24 eveln

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Posted 18 July 2018 - 08:29 PM

faarrK ^^ :(

my condolences


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#25 scruffy1

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Posted 18 July 2018 - 10:37 PM

 


a few decades on might have been a different story, but losing a soul mate on the ascendant is not something i would wish on anyone else  :(

 

 

I'm really sorry to hear that.  What you're describing is rare enough but to have it all taken away... Is the old adage true about it's better to have love and lost?  Or is that basically bullshit?

 

 

 

that's impossible to answer with any certainty

 

i expect that perhaps time dulls the sparkle of all things, but then i have had elderly couples as patients where it is quite obvious they are still very much in love, in a sedate but sincere way, after well over half a century together

 

 

there's the magic of having been there, and the indelible memory of shared experience which is so precious to have, and then there's the shittiness of persistently remembering how much you don't have it any more, even though i am constantly sharing the events of the rest of my life with her memory as if she is still there, because i am well aware of what her response would have been to nearly all of them, and it somehow feels that realisation keeps her alive, in my thoughts

it's a bitter-sweet joy to love a memory

 

i still recall quite clearly my best effort to describe the feeling when she died, which was "like the earth opened up and swallowed half of me"

 

 

i quite truly believe that all people are like a ripple in the universe, and sometimes that disturbance is so in synch that it creates resonance that persists like a standing wave, for a very long time, possibly longer than our personal existence

 

there is one other person with whom i share such a certain telepathic ability that it would be dismissed as delusional by formal assessment... and interestingly the common ingredient is a degree of love that transcends being together... she's not so much one that got away, but more one that never got together

 

 

and the luck of hitting that sweet spot twice in a lifetime is already beyond the good fortune many people seem to hit in a life time


ummmmmmmmmmm............


#26 robzy

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Posted 19 July 2018 - 10:03 PM

 

 

 

...

Where are you these days? I think its been 4 years since we last met, and I'm sorry we didn't hang out more.

 

Rob.

 

 

Hey Rob. Likewise! I've been pretty slack getting in contact with people whenever I've been in Japan the last few years... once I get over there, I usually spend what scant time I can get with my girlfriend. I'll be in Tokyo for a week or so this September, if you're still there? Very much looking forward to hearing tales. I'm in Melbourne these days.

 

I'm back in Melbourne too, actually. Landed back 12 months ago.

 

Do you still have LiNE? If not, shoot me a PM with your mobile number? Lets grab a drink/tea/coffee/something?

 

Rob.






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