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hawkeye

Member Since 10 Sep 2008
Offline Last Active Jul 24 2017 04:00 PM
Ha. Good to know :) Updated 21 May · 0 comments
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About Me

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy... the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds; pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.

There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.

Community Stats


  • Group God
  • Active Posts 11,197
  • Profile Views 13,134
  • Member Title Shun the nonbeliever
  • Age 45 years old
  • Birthday November 1, 1971
  • Gender
    Male Male
  • Location
    Holy Terra

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