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Kimmo

Encroaching dystopia

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So I found myself in the leafy suburbs today, needing to lighten my load... Maps showed slim pickings for public toilets, but there was one in a park not far off. 

Parked the van, looked for the dunny, and found an evil robot instead. 

VoJtM5fh.jpg

Signs inside threatened me with eviction should I overstay my allotted ten minutes... I have an enlarged prostate, which can mean that's rushing me a bit. But the situation was getting urgent, and who knew if the only other dunny nearby was any different?

There was muzak. A few minutes later it's startlingly interrupted by an American voice saying how the dunny is empty and the door will open, but the voice changed its tune when I moved. Arsehole thing. 

Anyway, after about eight minutes I was trying to get some paper happening - the bastard electric dispenser would only make with three or four squares at a time with a huge delay that was doubled or tripled if you pressed the button for more too soon, which wouldn't have been such a problem if it was triple-ply, but of course not... So what should have taken thirty seconds chewed up my remaining couple of minutes, and I only just managed to get my strides up by the time the bastard yank voice started threatening me... I thought the door would open and the cleaning cycle would start before I could wash my hands, but after a couple of tries it generously put the tap on for a second and a half (no soap).

And I thought to myself, this is the world we're building for ourselves? Really? This. 

 

So yeah, share your stories of the world turning into a place you only recognise from gloomy SF.

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🙂

Indications of the world going techno-nuts are everywhere but fear not, most all of it is being inadequately created by morons or script kiddies in need of a nappy change.

I've been in one of those dictator toilets a couple of times myself. To be fair the concept was to not allow enough time for some junkie to shoot up but it comes across as telling you how long you need to take a crap.

However fear not, it's pretty easy to fool them, the designers were not very smart. The ones here if you need more time just hit the exit button wait a two second gap and hit it again - confuses the hell out of the system and by the time it reboots you can push it once and leave 🙂

The intent is actually quite good:

http://www.wcinnovations.com.au/automated_public_toilets

You have to admit, far, far cleaner than the usual disgusting public loo.

A very recent script kiddy fuck up had me amused. My paperwork as in docs not toilet paper is in storage in W.A. for a few weeks yet and I needed my Tax File number.

No problem I think, I have a MyGov account with ATO linked so I can get it from there.

Um no, in order to prove my identity to logon I have to provide some personal information, including my tax file number...

Called a guy I know at ATO IT,  he just groaned, MyGov in his view is terminally fucked.

He just looked up my number for me - don't fuck with the IT department 🙂

Another beauty my BinL and I encountered recently, a ticketed car park with 15mis free parking, we were ten but the dipshit in front of us took so long we went over 15. Machine would not let us out.

Some profanity over the press-to-talk had the barrier raised toute suite 🙂

Cheers

 

 

 

Edited by chrisg
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/clicks to view Leonid's post

Yep, that ignore feature is totally kicking goals. 

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They've had similar to that sort here for yonks.  Part reason to stop the junkies using them as shooting galleries.

Supposedly they're self-cleaning too but I've got NFI just how the dry cycle would work.
I avoid public dunnies as much as possible but thanks to Type 2 Diabetes I can take a leak (which in itself can be minutes rather than seconds) then think I'm releived and need another one 15 minutes later.

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🙂

 

Both of you ignoring each other ?

Sounds like an M.E. impasse 🙂

Cheers

 

 

🙂

The dry cycle seems to work, every one I've entered seems clean AND dry.

In Canberra they probably just pipe in hot air from the House 🙂

Cheers

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28 minutes ago, chrisg said:

 

In Canberra they probably just pipe in hot air from the House 🙂

Cheers

The house of representatives?

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37 minutes ago, chrisg said:

Both of you ignoring each other ?

Nah. I find his brand of latte Communism adorable. It’s like watching the town arsonist running for fire chief.

 

So I watch.

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48 minutes ago, SacrificialNewt said:

The house of representatives?

Three of those four words are true.

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1 hour ago, Leonid said:

Nah. I find his brand of latte Communism adorable. It’s like watching the town arsonist running for fire chief.

 

So I watch.

🙂

 

A little difficult to reconcile when you are applauding Trump burning down the house... 🙂

Cheers

 

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18 minutes ago, chrisg said:

🙂

 

A little difficult to reconcile when you are applauding Trump burning down the house... 🙂

Cheers

 

Oh if socialists only stopped at that....

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13 minutes ago, chrisg said:

🙂

Cheers

I feel like this has been one of the more on-topic conversations recently.

It’s not often @Kimmo and I can stay on the same topic of toilets/socialism.

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🙂

 

 So you both specialise in giving each other the shite ? 🙂

Cheers

 

 

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Reminds me of grandad’s favourite joke

 

Q. Comrade will there still be idiots in a communist society?

A. No comrade. Those who believed in communism will no longer be idiots.

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20 minutes ago, chrisg said:

🙂

 

 So you both specialise in giving each other the shite ? 🙂

Cheers

 

 

It's more of a biblical relationship. We're both atheists but I'm of the firm belief that it is better to give than to receive.

So in this analogy, I give him shit, and he's the toilet in this relationship.

 

But because it's a socialist-manufactured toilet, it's manufactured without any standards so the shit just sprays everywhere and none of it ends up where it's supposed to.

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golly we've even got one of those up here in Port ... mind you I would be wary of using it just now. Unlike the one in the Daintree that's ended up in the river, this one is hopefully still in position but it's prolly got most of the detritus from Flagstaff hill in it.

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3 hours ago, @~thehung said:

this the one?

Yeah, except in a different spot and with a seat on the bowl, which is always nice

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This kind of thing is the result of some out of touch manager making a decision based on trends without consulting anyone.

5 hours ago, Kimmo said:

/clicks to view Leonid's post

Yep, that ignore feature is totally kicking goals. 

You can ignore people now?  Fuck that's awesome.

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Hasn't that feature been active since the move to Invision, like 2008 ?

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2 minutes ago, Rybags said:

Hasn't that feature been active since the move to Invision, like 2008 ?

 

And you know me just that little bit better - I don't notice much  😛

 

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Don't suppose one needed to know the feature was there if one never had the urge to ignore another member

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11 minutes ago, eveln said:

Don't suppose one needed to know the feature was there if one never had the urge to ignore another member

Fair point.

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If I had to butt heads with a demented reactionary, I'd pick @TDAS. At least he had some manners, and often seemed to argue in good faith...

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